It’s been way too long since we’ve heard from Brené Brown on Switched ON Living.

Dr Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston (and a self-described “enraged Texan”). But Brené is so much more than your average academic.

She’s a genuine social research superstar whose speeches and interviews have been watched and enjoyed by literally tens of millions of people across traditional and social media.

In this video from the Motivation Thrive series, we meet Brené in brilliant form, discussing several of her signature themes including trust, courage and belonging.

The Motivation Thrive video features excerpts from a long interview that Brené gave in 2017 to New York Times bestselling author, Marie Forleo. The full interview is totally worth watching, but even the excerpts show us Brené’s unmatched ability to deliver her message.

The first theme is building trusting, high-quality relationships, and for this Brené re-introduces to us her BRAVING concept.

It’s a re-introduction because our Retire Better blog first featured the BRAVING model several months. But it’s such a powerful reference tool and so applicable to everyone aged over 50 who is fighting to break free from the shackles of an inane traditional retirement that it’s definitely worth a refresher.

BRAVING is an acronym for the seven essential elements of trust that Brené discerned from her research findings:
•    boundaries – when we don’t know what they are, we ask, what’s OK, what’s not OK
•    reliability – we do what we say and we are what we say. Brené says the hardest thing about reliability is that we’re not hustling for worthiness, we don’t over commit and under-deliver
•    accountability – we don’t back-channel and we don’t blame, we hold ourselves and other accountable in straightforward way
•    vault – the vault is the antithesis of gossip, it’s not telling stories about others in a bid to form connections
•    integrity – choosing courage over comfort, practising our values, choosing what’s right over what’s fun, fast and easy. Brené says we live in a culture that doesn’t do discomfort
•    non-judgemental – I can ask for help without judging myself and others can ask for help without me judging them
•    generosity – Brené said this is hardest one for her, we need to give others the opportunity to explain their actions before we launch into our anger.

The BRAVING model comes from Brené’s book, Braving the Wilderness. The wilderness in the title is a metaphor for when we’re on our own, those times when we stand alone, when we go out on a limb, or when we walk away from what we know and our ideological bunkers and beliefs.

Another of her themes is self-worth. Our worth and our belonging are not negotiated with other people. Brené says for herself, she has a deep sense of who she is and her personal values (courage and faith) and these are non-negotiable with other people.

Brené explains (in the context of her interview with Marie) that she would be willing to negotiate a contract, or even a topic, but not at the expense of her values nor her sense of herself.

Compromising our values may allow us to fit in with others, but we do it at the expense of belonging to ourselves.

This message is especially apposite for people aged over 50 who are looking to take their lives in a new direction. We too must find the courage to brave the wilderness, to find our values and pursue our calling.

As Brené says about herself, she’s never achieved a single thing in her life comfortably. That would also be true for many of us.

There’s so much great wisdom in the interview that any short summary won’t do it justice. Suffice to say that the time we spend watching the full interview with Marie Forleo is time very well invested.

Here’s the full interview with Marie Forleo